From time to time I like to include posts from other sources, bloggers or news sources I think are important.  Here are a few I've been looking at recently.  Couple of experts and then a person going through the fallout of infidelity after a year.  What would you advise?

Infidelity Expert Says Happy Husbands Cheat Too | The Houston Exponent

In an infidelity study published earlier this year in the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, 75% of the cheating husbands who were questioned, said they did NOT have “lots of marital problems” prior to their affair. …

Publish Date: 04/15/2011 9:54

http://www.houstonexponent.com/infidelity-expert-says-happy-husbands-cheat-too/

Challenges Dealing With Infidelity — After-The-Affair

He practices marriage counseling in Portland, OR at the Portland Couples Counseling Center. http://www.marriage-and-relationship-counseling.com/marriage-counseling-portland-oregon.html. For information about how to choose a Relationship …

Publish Date: 04/18/2011 18:25

http://after-the-affair.info/challenges-dealing-with-infidelity

Almost a year : Where am I? – Talk About Marriage

Coping with Infidelity Relationship recovery from the destructiveness of infidelity. …. Planning a conversation with some else to talk through marriage issues or any issues would be "financially stupid" according to her. As much as I would like her to get rid of some of her stress and then have her come to a realization of "I want to be with him, I can't believe I almost lost him. ….. Get The Family & Marriage Counseling Directory Help Guide via Email: …

Publish Date: 04/25/2011 9:10

http://talkaboutmarriage.com/coping-infidelity/24662-almost-year-where-am-i.html

For more information about how to THRIVE after an affair, take a look at this Suriviving After An Affair.

Take care,

Dr. Max

Dr. Max Vogt

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http://www.nowyoucancommunicate.com “I will help.” – Dr. Max Marriage counseling, marriage help, marriage communication, love sex and marriage, affairs, in-law problems, stop your divorce, I will help

A lot of people think they can "slide" on their marriage.

They think that problems will just "eventually go away" or "after the kids are gone things will be better" or "If it gets too bad, I’ll just leave and meet someone new."

Here’s a dose of reality… continued

Dr. Max Vogt

http://www.couplescoach.com “I will help.” – Dr. Max Marriage counseling, marriage help, marriage communication, love sex and marriage, affairs, in-law problems, stop your divorce, I will help

It’s a common enough thought — I just chose the wrong person for a partner, and if given a chance, I will choose better (I hope) next time. I heard it just yesterday in the checkout stand at the grocery store,,, continued

Dr. Max Vogt

http://www.couplescoach.com “I will help.” – Dr. Max Marriage counseling, marriage help, marriage communication, love sex and marriage, affairs, in-law problems, stop your divorce, I will help

Is Your Marriage in Danger?

Many couples need guidance in identifying the specific problems they can tackle in improving their marriages or relationships.

You might feel that "something is wrong" or something hurts or doesn’t feel right, but you can’t exactly put your finger on it.

It can frequently be helpful to have something like a "danger signs" chart (like used in helping people diagnose cancer or other disorders). This kind of "chart" can help you pinpoint areas of pain or discomfort… and thus help know where to put your focus.

Also, you might wonder whether you should just "ignore it and it will go away…" and could use some help in identifying areas or "danger signs" that are really significant (and shouldn’t just "be ignored").  continued

 

Dr. Max Vogt

http://www.NowYouCanCommunicate.com “Free Video Reveals the #1 Secret for Solving Marriage Communication Problems in Only Five Minutes” http://www.nowyoucancommunicate.com now

Jenna hates "girl movies"

Hi, this is Dr. Max, marriage counselor and bestselling author.

One of my readers, Jenna,  wrote me that she can’t stand watching "chick flicks" anymore.

Used to love them.

She won’t even go out with her friends to see any

See, all that talk about love makes her feel bad.

All that yearning for love makes her sick to her stomach.

It makes her feel like she has a hole in her stomach that can’t be filled.

She is in a relationship… with the man she once felt blind love for.

Where did it go?

She’s married, but feels complete separation from Rob, her husband.

It’s not that she hates him or anything like that.

She actually likes him.

But as she says, it’s ironic.

They are in the same house, but it’s like they are strangers.

Marriage just isn’t what she hoped it would be.

She dreamed of closeness and having a soul mate.

Meanwhile Rob feels the same way.

He doesn’t know who this person is he’s married to.

They say it’s like they are roommates.

They don’t fight.

They just don’t really talk.

Yes, they function and get the kids to school and pay bills.

But there’s a void there,

Why?

Because they don’t know how to communicate.

They just now got my course, which is why I know them.  They both wrote me.

They are hopeful and they should be

They have some big positive surprises coming.

Once they know some simple skills of communication, they’ll notice thawing.

They’ll find their love again.

I’ve seen it happen over and over again because of

http://www.NowYouCanCommunicate.com

This is the course that is using simple videos to change peoples’ relationships.

Dr. Max

Go there and I’ll give you my very best technique for FREE right now

htttp://www.NowYouCanCommunicate.com

Dr. Max Vogt

http://www.NowYouCanCommunicate.com “Free Video Reveals the #1 Secret for Solving Marriage Communication Problems in Only Five Minutes” http://www.MarriageCommunicationSecrets.com now

Ever get into the middle of one of those arguments with you partner and you can’t even remember what you were fighting about?

Well there’s a great reason for why that happens.

It has to do with a trigger that goes off in your brain when you draw certain conclusions from what you are hearing.

You have to manage that trigger. 

How are you going to manage it if you don’t even know it’s there?

It’s like a loaded gun and you have to unload it and then for extra measure put the safety on.

Anna and Rick used to find themselves in that spot frequently.

They felt that trigger go off and then felt they couldn’t help it, like it became inevitable that they would fight.

They’d be fighting and each wondering, why the bleep are we doing this?

And finally what the bleep are we even arguing about?

But there they were all over again.

They loved each other but there they were once again going at each other.

The relationship was deteriorating almost on a daily basis.

Until I showed them the "Refocusing" technique.

They both burst out laughing… "that’s us!" they said.

Now they really don’t argue at all.

Because they have this and the other 12 techniques, they have a brand new relationship.

Even though they’ve been together 22 years, they say it’s "like a brand new marriage."

That’s because now they can communicate.

They didn’t go to a therapist

They just used this course:  Now You Can Communicate
 

Dr. Max Vogt

Dr. Max Vogt

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