Your Questions About Does Marriage Counseling Work

MarriageCounseling answers:

YES, I can truly say it DOES help situations in your lives & gives you impute from a Professional. I’ve been to a LOT of counselors in my lifetime being married to an alcoholic who now is my ex husband. They have you BOTH fill out forms, some will see you one at a time, then bring you both in as a couple. My ex cheated on me countless times & left me a few to go live with others. At our last counseling session, we were told he was a “womanizer” & to get help for that along with of course AA. I tho’t if he’d stop drinking our marriage would at least have a chance as I’ve been sober for 20+ yrs. WRONG!!! He also told us our marriage would NOT work out. How rite he was! I finally accepted the truth as such & let our marriage go. Of course I’ve since found happiness. But, counseling IS well worth it, at least give it a try IF you feel you do need it…the best to you…:)

MarriageCounseling answers:

* At the end of couple’s therapy, 75% of couples receiving therapy are better off than similar couples who did not receive therapy.
* Sixty five percent of couples report “significant” improvement based on averaged scores of marital “satisfaction.”
* Most couples will benefit from therapy, but both spouses will not necessarily experience the same outcomes or benefits.
* Therapies that produce the greatest gain and are able to maintain that gain over the long amount of time, tend to affect the couple’s emotional bonds and help the spouse’s work together to achieve a greater level of “differentiation” or emotional maturity.5

MarriageCounseling answers:

Counseling only works if A. Both parties really WANT to see how they BOTH contributed to the problems in the marriage, and B. The counselor works only to foster communication, not place blame.

If your wife thinks it is all your fault she cheated, then she will not work on her own issues and therefore nothing will change.

If you think all your marital problems are just because your wife cheated and that none of the issues began with you, then you will not work on your issues and nothing will change.

You can only save a relationship that has been torn apart this way if BOTH parties can see where they contributed and work on their own issues in order to make the marriage stronger. I personally don’t see the need for counseling to achieve this goal, but some people do. However, no matter how much counseling you get it won’t work unless you both take responsibility for your own part and do something to fix it.

EDIT: I say get the divorce. If you don’t think you did anything to contribute to your wife feeling like it was necessary to cheat on you, and she doesn’t see that she’s wrong then you’re just wasting $150 an hour. Of course you did something, she wasn’t just sitting around one day all sunshine and roses and said “Hmmm… I think I’ll go have sex with someone else!” She probably told you many times that she was unhappy, and I bet you fought constantly. She is still wrong, but again unless you intend to change your behavior, whatever made her unhappy enough to think it was a good idea to cheat will still drive you apart. Save your money for the divorce.

MarriageCounseling answers:

No. You have free will. God will forgive you all you have to is ask. If he can forgive murders he surely will forgive you for remarrying.